Cringe Inducing

Just when I though I would rest easy because the fucking IPL was over. Our honourable loon goes and does something like this:

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/sports/cricket/ipl-2012/news/Mamata-Banerjee-to-felicitate-IPL-champions-KKR/articleshow/13599747.cms

Why? oh why? For fuck's sake it is just a domestic competition. Where were the felicitations when Bengal won the Ranji or Mohun bagan/ East Bengal won the IFA shield and the National Football League?

Felicitating the Bengal team for winning Ranji might still have meant something because it is Team Bengal. But KKR? Seriously? The team is owned by the probably the most cringe inducing actor of Bollywood who happens to hail from Delhi. There are hardly any players in the team to make it a team from Bengal. Only it happens to bear the name "Kolkata" which it tried to shed a few years back, if I remember it correctly.

Kolkata is not Bengal. Damn it!

Please stop this nuisance.

A list of things irking me

What can I say. I love making lists. (avoiding deadly PJ about serial killers here)
So here is the latest list of things around the world irking me apart from Religion and fantatics of course, which is going to outlive us all, even if it manages to kill all life on the planet.

• IPL: Seriously, how can people watch it or endure it. Is there any point in being Ravindra jadeja and pasting a bowler like some XYZ Singh to all parts of the ground whose dimensions if reduced by 10 yards or so will become the fielding restriction circle itself. It is becoming any eyesore whenever I visit cricinfo or Times of India. Its like that most annoying song of Salman Khan/Emraan Hashmi you keep hearing at every corner of the street during festivities. And you simply can't shake it off, even though that is probably competing with some of Bappi da's worst music in the world
• If IPL can still be forgiven, what is with this sympathy towards Pakistan cricket. Yes I can understand that coming from the bulk of the other cricketing nations whose knowledge about Pakistani people is limited to the great Wasim Akram and Zaheer Abbas. But it is deplorable and highly shameful coming from Indians. Don't forget the nations is a backstabbing viper, whose citizen Kasab is still stuck to our flesh as a thorn. If the government has done something right is to stop all cricketing relations with the nations. Long story short, India and Indians should just ignore Pakistan. Don't forget the numerous terrorist attacks, the three wars where Indian citizens died defending nothing but snow and sand. In fact whatever land was won, was returned by the short-sighted politicians like Indira Gandhi, who thought she could buy sympathy [Result was simply a praise or two and then it was all forgotten]. Forgive but do not forget. Learn from history.We may not have our 9/11. But the total number of people who dies from various terrorist attacks since the 90's are way more than that in 9/11. I admit that majority of Pakistanis have nothing to do with these attacks and that they are the worst sufferers of terrorism in the present world. They do not deserve that. But a nation has to be selfish towards its own sons and daughters. We have enough problems in our nation to cope with. We don't need sympathy towards a people who have constantly let people like Zia-ul-Haq lead them into such a radicalized state. As the cartoon said, they deserve these leaders and terrorism as much as we deserve our leaders and corruption. So no cricket and no nothing else. That's it. And for fuck's sake stop saying that IPL misses Pakistani players. I do not care a dime about IPL. But Pakistanis deserve no share of the hard-earned money of the common men in India.
• Mamata Banerjee................Need I say more? She might be the most honest politician in India, but the only reason for her existence seems to have been eradication of the plague called CPM. The problem with such an existence is that as soon as you achieve your goal, your life is left with no meaning. Just like Israel has no reason to exist now and nor do Pakistan. I am so exasperated by her and her antics. TMC goons nowadays are as good as CPM goons were in those days. The problem is that in this digital world they keep getting caught red handed even though hardly any punishment is meted out to them, as is usual with any party in power.
• Congress, the Gandhis and their lackeys like Diggi Raja..........These people lower the IQ of the entire nation. After the debacle in Delhi civic polls Kapil Sibal said it wasn't because people thought congress was responsible for the numerous scams that have surfaced of late. He said civic polls were about local issues and not the national issues. I fervently hope that this is not the case and people are intelligent enough to vote against congress for the very reasons Sibal denies. The very fact that Sibal denies them to be reasons is another way of saying "People are just lain stupid. Whatever issue you can present to them they will just gobble it up. Their memory is poor. And long live Congress and its ways". That is just plain insult to the citizens of India. This is just one statement from a Congress member. I am not even going into whatever bullshit that spews out of Rahul Gandhi (like that famous comment regarding his being a brahmin or Hindu terrorism being a greater threat than Islamic terrorism) or the other people of Congress. I will give Congress thumbs up in one issue though, that is trying to bring FDI in India. Though that is immediately offset by their poor commitment to their ambition regarding FDI.
• Roadies, Big Boss and the thousand other reality shows out there. But especially Roadies. They just assume the audience is not only dumb but as dumb as fuck. And to my dismay the audience continuously proves them right. I have never watched a single episode of any of the reality shows. I am just irked by the fact that people around me watch them. And for those who still can't get me regarding this issue please watch the spoof Rowdies on youtube. That I have watched and immensely appreciated. Big Boss is as bad as Roadies. There are many reasons for that. I am going to state just one here. Its none other than Salman Khan who despite being a murderer of human beings and endangered animals never actually had to pay for his crimes. And people worship this guy! 
• People talking about how Tendulkar should retire. To them I say just name a suitable replacement. And no, Virat Kohli doesn't count. because he is already an established player in the ODI team and he can at most fill one part of the huge vacancy left by Dravid and Ganguly in the test team. You say Rohit Sharma? LOL......the guy doesn't even value his wicket. Ajinkya Rahane?..............too immature. First let him play in place of the totally amoeba like form of Sehwag. Pujara?..........same reason as Rahane. Manoj Tiwary?.......Doesn't matter how much Gavaskar praises him. He is simply not up to the standards of even someone like Gautam gambhir. 
• This endless fascination of some people with European football leagues. Don't get me wrong but I love football. That is I love quality football. Like the ones Brazil or Germany play at the world cups, and somewhat about the Euro Cup. And there are few people out there with more knowledge about international football statistics than me. But I can't seem to give a shit about Manchester United or Barcelona. Screw Messi. He might have all the talent in the world but he plays shit if his Barca teammates are taken away from him. The last time I actually liked European Football leagues was when Real Madrid was at its pomp with Luis Figo and the genius Zinedine Zidane creating magic in the field. To me supporting chelsea is like if I say I support the Los Angeles Lakers and keep on talking endlessly about how good Kobe Bryant is. I can debate with you gladly and endlessly about whether Puskas was better or Platini. If Lev yashin was as good as everybody say he was. But here I put a stop. No club level sports please. So stop talking about these pointless leagues in front of me. 
• Most Hindi movies................no comments here. just go and visit The Vigit Idiot a wonderful blog by Sahil Rizwan. you can find why I hate them.

A List of fictitious funny titles for books and movies related to cricket players and officials

During this world cup, Cricinfo introduced the chatterbox in its live scorecard and commentary. In one of those inconsequential boring matches involving a superpower an a superminnow, a nice idea took root in the chatterbox. How about we think up funny titles for books or movies that could be made for cricketers and cricket officials? And the idea spread like wildfire and could not be contained by any of the moderators until very late in the match, when they refused to publish any more comments on this. It was such a fun task, that I decided to keep a record of all the titles people came up with and share them in my blog. So here is the list.....Many of the titles are ideas of yours truly..

So start laughing:

• "DROP Dead Gorgeous" - Kamran Akmal
• "Kill Ball": Robin Peterson to Ashish Nehra
• "Four Drops and a Birthday" - Kamran Akmal and Ross Taylor
• "Taken" - Not written by Kamran Akmal
• "Mr & Mr Smith" - Steven & Graeme
• "The Dark Night" - World Cup 2007 final is more like it.
• "A shot in the dark" - Last world cup final.
• "The Namesake" - Ross and Brendan Taylor
• "The wrestler" starring Andrew Symonds
• "How I met Your Wife" - Shane Warne to Arun Nayar
• "Pulp Fiction"- Batting Powerplays
• "Much Ado About Nothing" - Batting Powerplays
• "Damn Good Batting"- Ashish Bagai
• "The Day the Score Stood Still" - Rahul Dravid
• "King Bong" - The Bangladesh team against England
•  "Flight Club" - Graeme Swann and Murali
• "The day it spun" - Jason Krejza
• "Lost in translation" - DRS reviews
• "Star Wars" - Murali vs SRT
• "The Singh's Speech" - Harbhajan on the pitch
• "The Great Gambler" - MS Dhoni
• "Face off" - Balaji Rao & Romesh Powar
• "Match me if you can" - Muthiah Muralitharan & Sachin Tendulkar
• "little red riding hood" - Tatenda Taibu
• "Tu Chal Main Aaya" - Indian batsmen after Tendulkar
• "Closed Eyes" - cricinfo on comments of some guy who tried repeatedly and failed!
• "Unbreakable" - SRT's Dirty Bat
• "Phas gaya re Odoyo" - Kenyan team
• "Gold Finger" - starring ajantha mendis
• "Up in the Air" - Tim Southee (He caused an uproar by kissing some passenger in his flight to India)
• "Paranormal Activity" - by Indian batsmen after Tendulkar got out against South Africa in the league stage.
• "honey, we shrunk the total" - Indian team to Sachin Tendulkar
• "how to train your dragon" - Andrew Symond's Coach
• "Ballman Begins" - Shahid Afridi on randomly becoming a bowler from a batsman
• "Who's line (and length) is it anyway" - Ashish Nehra
• "Karthik calling Karthik" - Murali to Dinesh
• "Bend it like Bowden"
• "The last fingerbender" - Billy Bowden
• "The Blair witch project" - India playing Australia in WC2003 final
• "Scent of a Woman" - Shane Warne
• "Psycho" - Sreesanth
• "Scream" - Sreesanth, "Scream II" - Harbhajan, "Scream III" - Kohli
• "The Da Vinci Code" - Batting Powerplay for India
• "I am legend" - SRT
• "ek ruka hua faisla" - decision on publishing comments by cricinfo!
• "The Curious Case of Bangladesh Batsmen" - BCB after the debacle against West Indies
• "how to lose friends and alienate people" - Cricinfo commenatators for not publishing the last 99999 comments
• "Dead spin society" - Harbhajan and Piyush Chawla
• "A walk to remember" - Virender Sehwag on the art of running between the wickets
• "The Shashank Manohar Redemption" - Lalit Modi
• The Hangover - Andrew Symonds
• Munaf Patel's fielding:- Dead Man walking
• Bend it like Waqar - PCB
• The Invisible - My Comments :'(
• 12 Angry men - Indian team
• How did the chicken cross the road? - Trent Johnston
• Gone Baby Gone - Zulqarnain Haider
• "The fastest Indian in the world" - Zaheer Khan?
• Confessions of a Dropaholic- Kamran Akmal
• Striptease - Saurav Ganguly & Andrew Flintoff
• Jab We met - Bhajji and Sreesanth
• dirty dancing - sreesanth
• The Expendables - Associate Cricketing Nations
• Eyes Wide Shut - starring k akmal and m van wyk
• "Swing is king" by Dale Steyn
• The last hairbender - Lasith Malinga
• Legally Blonde- All Pakistani players with blonde highlights.
• Clockwork Orange- Ryan ten Doeschate
• Hair Color for dummies - Kevin O Brien, Zaheer Khan
• "serendipity" - bollinger - hussey / KP - morgan
• Dude, where is my spin? Harbhajan
• Signs - Piyush Chawla's leg spin.
• The (tv) Mechanic - Ricky Ponting.
• The Replacements - Mike Hussey and eoin Morgan.
• Flubber - Kamran Akmal.
• When to end a topic - cricinfo commentator.
• Disaster movie - Kamran Akmal.
• "Lord of the swing" by Wasim Akram.
• Black Swan-Gramae Swann.
• 'The English Patient'- Kevin Petersen. 
• Total Recall - by Murali. 
• Once Upon a Time in India - Balaji Rao.
• "ab tak chappan" Hashim Amla's avg. 
• definitely,maybe- england team." 
• I Know what you did last Summer " Salman butt, Muhammad Aamir, Muhammad Asif! 
• Gone with the wind - Sultan Zarawani.
• True Grit - Irish Team.
• M.S. I Love you - Piyush Chawla.
• There Will Be Blood- Razzaq, (Pak vs SA 2nd ODI).
• Cast Away - Lalit Modi.
• Love actually - Imran Tahir.
• Bees Saal Baad - SRT.
• "The Battle of the Bulge" Inzy & Ryder, Foreword by Dwayne Leverock.
• SlumpForm Millionaire - Irfan Pathan ( $1,900,000 in IPL).
• "No country for Old men" - Sourav Ganguly.
• "Dude where is my swing" by Irfan Pathan.
• "Who moved my Crease" - Inzy.
• My Name is Khan - by Zaheer Khan.
• Big Momma - Leverock.
• "To kill a mocking press" - MSD.
• Gone in 60 Seconds- Indian Lower Middle Order.
• Scary Movie (Dhoni's batting).
• "The twister" - by Murali.
• "Two Thousand Splendid Runs" - SRT.
• Jaws - by Shahid Afridi.
• 127 hours (of doing nothing) - Gautam Gambhir.
• Stumped!- M.S. Dhoni.
• One Flew Over Kamran's Gloves.
• How to squabble but still get away with it - Stuart Broad.
• How to make people believe you are a batsman BY Afridi.
• How to play a World-cup with no native players in the team - Canada.
• "How to play test cricket for england" - Irish Cricket Team.
• "Staying Focused" by Sreesanth.
• "How to get into the Indian team" by Piyush Chawla.
• How to create a list of totally useless and hilarious books that we would liked published, by yours trulies. 
• a tale of two countries..by ed joyce and eoin morgan.
• "Facing bouncers" By Suresh Raina & Rohit sharma, Inspiration Sultan Zarawani.
• "How to win in a T20 final" by Misbah Ul Haq.
• "Playing for the country" -MS Dhoni.
• "still seventeen"-afridi.
• How to make Two referrals insufficient - By Mr. Asoka di silva.
• How to name IPL teams - By the Kochi Tuskers.
• The Social Network by Kevin Peitersen.
• "how to change names, get banned, retire and still continue to play"- Mohammad Yousuf.
• How to Hug-Priety Zinta. Foreword by Yuvraj Singh.
• "My Experiments with Chawla" - MSD.
• "Staying Calm when 22 required of 1 Ball" by B.Mac.
• How to Retire Young - Zulqarnain Haider.
• How to hit hundreds that dont win you matches - Sachin Ramesh Tendulkar.
• "Why are we here?" by the Kenyan team.
• "How to make friends" - Kevin Pietersen.
• "Being great 12th Man" - Raina.
• "How to carry on an online discussion during a match without talking about it at all" - Foreword by guess who.
• "Art of Ball Changing" by G Swann.
• "How to be fat and fit- Jesse Ryder.
• "How to forget about Camera's on field" - by Afridi.
• "DRS wars- The Umpire Strikes Back" - By Asoka de Silva
• "Having a doosra without a pehla" - Harbhajan Singh.
• The art of using the batting powerplay - Team India.
• "HAIR apparent" by kallis,strauss,bhogle.foreword by warne.
• "Topic is over" - exasperated cricinfo commentator..
• "Spoiling the fun by being uptight" - in reply to above!
• "The art of disappearing" by zulqairnan haidar.
• How to get a decent haircut by Ramiz Raja.
• "how to hit 150 K's an hour" Praveen kumar.
• Using the Commentator's Curse to good effect By Ravi Shastri.
• The Heimlich Maneuver- By the South African team.
• "how to celebrate" - Gibbs.
• "the art of great death bowling" by every indian bowler.
• Being Robin Hood- The English Team.
• "Stretching a joke too far" - Chatterbox participants @ cricinfo.fr the online commentators..
• " How about looking foolish in front of millions by ridiculous commentary".
• "How to be a Notout Batsman in an ODI" by Dhoni.
• "world cup semi finals" by Alan Donald. Foreword by Lance Klusener.
• "100 tips to become team mate's favorite" by S. Sreesanth.
• "No country for old men" by dada.
• "the art of sharing the joys of winning" by eng cricketers.
• "The art of praising SRT" by SMG ??.
• How to ban players by PCB chairman Ijaz Butt.
• "Ashwin - The Egg Layer" by Dhoni.
• Why I Am The Best There Has Ever Been by Justin Green.
• Dutch Pronunciation- By Eric Szwarczynski.
• "How to change fast bowlers into medium pacers within a year"...by BCCI.
• inception to implosion. by indian middle order.  
• Salman Butt "Betting 101".
• "How to win friends and influence people" by Bangladesh cricketers!."
• Appropriate Behavior for Modern Technologies such as phones and Twitter" by Shane Warne.
• how to keep hands clean' by punter.
• "How to increase your tolerance levels" by Sidhu.
• "Experiments with a Winning Combination" By Dhoni.
• The Curious Case of Pakistani Wicketkeepers by Z Haider.
• Chris Martin - "Batting 101".
• "Blood Brothers" by Umar akmal dedicated to Kamran Akmal.
• "How to lose a commercial on last ball" By Nehra ;)
• 'The Art of Destroying Bowling Lineups' by Ross Taylor with help from Kamran Akmal
• "how to bat"-chris martin.
• "The Handy Manual of Fix-it-all" by Salman Butt
• When to get injured by Umar Akmal.  
• "A Slap from the TurbanMan" by Sreesanth ;)
• "Catch Me If you Can" by Salman Butt forward by Kamran Akmal  
• "Commentary for Dummies" must have a foreword by Ranjith Fernando!
• "How to not get in trouble" by Andrew Symonds 
• Biting the Cherry... by Shahid Afridi!
• Commentary for Dummies .. A better book wud be written by Sidhu !!!
• How to try to bowl yorkers and screw up..By Agarkar, Nehra and Munaf.
• "Enigma of the last over" by Dhoni ;)" 
• DANCING IN THE PITCH " BY SREESANTH  
• "Commentary for Dummies" by Ravi Shastri?  
• Ricky Ponting has been signed up to write "Clean hands and Personal Hygiene".
• Targeting flies around the cricket field...by Van wyk..foreword by Kamran Akmal
• " Unraveling the UDRS" by the ICC
• "How to use the 12th man at all times" by Team India
• "Brilliant Glovework" The art of keeping from Kamran Akmal.
• "How to increase mental bench strength" foreword by MSD?
• How to play the batting poweplay. Foreward by MSD.

The best batting innings of the world cups......

I am a fortunate man to have witnessed the best batting innings in the World Cups so far, and I have not missed a single cricket match since the 1996 Cup. Yes, it may be unfathomable to certain people, but this innings bettered, Sir Vivian Isaac Alexander Richards' 181, Kapil Dev's phenomenal 175, Stephen Fleming's 134, Aravinda De Silva's 107, Sachin Tendulkar's 98, not withstanding numerous cameos by legendary match winners like Lance Klusener, Sanath Jayasuriya, Adam Gilchrist, etc. Yes, I am talking about the gem of an innings Andrew Strauss played today at the Chinnaswamy Stadium at Bengaluru- an innings of 158 runs off 145 balls, studded with 18 boundaries and a massive sixer, an innings that threatened to pull off an immense chase of 339 runs and helped pull off a tie......a far better result considering the fact that none of the teams deserved to lose this match. Today Strauss batted like God. He simply could not be ruffled by the Indian bowlers. He virtually got the requisite boundary every over during the improbable run chase and kept milking the rest of the balls for singles and doubles. Such was the awesome form of the man that only a delivery that even a God would fear to play could get him out. And he got out to the best delivery of the match by a fair distance- a toe crushing reverse swinging yorker from Zaheer Khan. What more can a foreign player expect than a standing ovation from the most devoted fans of the opposing team, when he takes the long walk back to the pavilion and he deservedly got that. Perhaps he is right in saying that today he played the innings of his life. I salute to the man who provided such wondrous entertainment amidst the mundane matches till date in this world cup. I will keep this innings right there in my top shelf along with Herschelle Gibbs' 175 in that mother of all ODI matches.

Andrew Strauss came to silence the Indian spectators and won their cheering praise instead......grudging respect but respect all the same.

About another legend: Jacques Kallis

At the moment I am writing this blog post, the current Jacques Kallis cricket statistics read as follows:

Tests:

Matches: 143 Innings as a batsman: 242 Runs: 11650 Batting average: 56.82
Strike Rate: 45.12 100s: 38 50s: 54
Innings as a bowler: 238 Wickets: 269 Best bowling Innings: 6/54 Best bowling match: 9/92 Bowling average: 31.95 Economy: 2.83 Strike Rate: 67.6 5 wickets: 5

One Day Internationals:

Matches: 307 Innings as a Batsman: 293 Runs: 11002 Batting Average: 45.84
Strike Rate: 72.77 100s: 17 50s: 80
Innings as a bowler: 307 Wickets: 259 Best bowling Innings: 5/30
Bowling average: 31.90 Economy: 4.82 Strike Rate: 39.6 5 wickets: 2

Mind-Boggling aren't they? This old horse has been the most accomplished accumulator ever of runs and wickets in both forms of the game. Talk about consistent performance and he sets the standards in cricket- whatever maybe the form of it- be it batting, bowling or even catching (He has tremendous reflexes as a slip catcher) What awes me most is his record of being the only cricketer ever to have scored over 11000 runs and taken over 250 wickets in both forms of the game. Surely the greatest All-Rounder ever?

But people won't admit that ever. They love to romanticize about Sir Garfield Sobers, Keith Miller, The golden Quadret of Richard Hadlee, Imran Khan, Kapil Dev and Ian Botham. Even Shaun Pollock would be rated a better All-Rounder than Kallis. Now why is that?

That is because we love impact. The glamour of quick scoring, hitting the ball out of the park, a fearsome fiery spell in fast bowling- this is what appeals to us. We don't appreciate the gradual process of accumulating runs and tirelessly bending the back over after over on a flat track for a wicket. That is what Jacques Kallis does. And boy does he excel in it? Refer to his awesome statistics.

Ask anyone to build an all-time XI in any form of the game and he would consider the cricketers I mentioned above to Kallis. Because winning is the key to success. But ask anyone to save a test match, He will ask Kallis to bat for his life.

So hats off to the great man who has been the mainstay of the South African cricket team for a decade and more.

And here is a statistical analysis for those who believe in statistics only: http://www.espncricinfo.com/magazine/content/current/story/495719.html 

Now because I can't resist a relevant quip here it is: open Google Pakistan and write Jacques Kallis in the search box. Have a look at the relevant popular searches! Watch out for the amazing things the Pakistanis generally associate with Kallis and search!

About My Personal RAJNIKANTH

In the leading up to the selection of the All Time XI by the Cricinfo Jurors and Readers, all the eminent personalities of cricket (prolific former players and the know-it-all cricket journalists) have been coming up with different types of World XI so that OUR GOD SACHIN TENDULKAR is excluded from them. Agreed that there are highly specific constraints to these teams but how do you exclude GOD from the universe? Its like giving a long speech on Life, Universe and Everything without once uttering 42. So here is my logic how SACHIN belongs to each of those World XI:

• The excluded by Gideon Heigh (http://www.cricinfo.com/magazine/content/story/481072.html) 

His logic is since Sachin Tendulkar has already been selected into the small group of players from whom Cricinfo is going to select the World XI, and he is just making up a World XI from among those excluded, He can't select Sachin Tendulkar. My logic is “Who the hell are you, mere mortal, to include or exclude Sachin Tendulkar. He can't be included or excluded. He just is. All you are required to do is choose the other ten players”

• Thrill-a-minute by Ian Chappell (http://www.cricinfo.com/magazine/content/story/481212.html)
  

Hey Loser, If you are not thrilled every minute by Tendulkar bowling, fielding, strolling, swimming, cooking, sleeping or even urinating (leave alone batting) then you are leading a pathetic life and you don't deserve to exist. Crawl away to some corner and die. The world would be relieved without you.

• Poetry in motion by Suresh Menon (http://www.cricinfo.com/magazine/content/story/482259.html)
  

When Sachin plays that backfoot punch through cover, have you heard of anything from anyone's mouth other than “wow”. Yes the mouth hangs open, with the tongue lolling and you wonder if that was more poetic than Shelley or Frost. So how come someone leaves out the LORD of Poets when they say the world was designed by the GOD churning out poetry (composing music) from every pore of his being.

• For your money (and your life) by David Frith (http://www.cricinfo.com/magazine/content/story/482114.html)
  

Ok. Ok. Conceded the guy has selected GOD (how can he not), but what the hell does he mean by refer to Bradman above? You can't refer to the innovation skill of GOD by saying "refer to Alva Edison above". Just like you can't include Rajnikanth in the top 10 list of Indian Actors and say "refer to Amitabh Bachchan above". Come on man, the guy IS RAJNIKANTH OF CRICKET.

• Nice guys finish first by Ramachandra Guha (http://www.cricinfo.com/magazine/content/story/483148.html)
  

Yes, I understand this guy's logic behind keeping out Tendulkar though. He is only considering those who finished first. But Sachin tendulkar never began nor did he finish. He and his innings just is, from the Big Bang till bad light at the end of the Universe.

• On the other hand by Mike Selvey (http://www.cricinfo.com/magazine/content/story/482991.html)
  

His criterion being the player has to be left handed, Sachin Tendulkar naturally walks into the team. But sadly this guy is either misinformed or doesn't know that Sachin Tendulkar writes left handed as well as wipes his ass after taking a dump with his left hand. All these people should do proper research before selecting any such team. 



My Personal All-Time XI
:
Sachin Tendulkar,Sachin Tendulkar,Sachin Tendulkar,Sachin Tendulkar,Sachin Tendulkar,Sachin Tendulkar,Adam Gilchrist(Wk),Sachin Tendulkar,Sachin Tendulkar,Sachin Tendulkar,Sachin Tendulkar.Any one dare challenge me? Hmpf!

Coutesy: Cricinfo, Faking News



My All-Time Cricket XI team

I have been thinking for a long time to put up a post like this. This list contains names of only those cricketers who I have seen playing that is only those players playing since 1994. Some of the players like Kapil Dev, Javed Miandad though are in a league of their own, were way past their prime after 1994. So I won't include them in this list.

So here is my list:

1. Virender Sehwag
   
2. Jacques Kallis
3. Ricky Ponting(C)
4. Sachin Tendulkar
5. Brian Lara
6. Rahul Dravid 
7. Adam Gilchrist(WK)
8. Wasim Akram
9. Shane Warne
10. Muttiah Muralitharan
11. Glenn Mcgrath

12th man:  Mathew Hayden

You might think that since I am an Indian I put a lot of Indian players into the team, especially Virender Sehwag in place of someone like Mathew Hayden. I have a perfectly valid reason for that. None of the Australian Batsmen played Glenn Mcgrath or Shane Warne, the bowlers who can be easily in any world class team. So I have placed Virender Sehwag ahead of Mathew Hayden. Kallis, is the best all-rounder of the two decades and is quite capable of opening the innings in any condition. His immaculate batting technique and temperament perfectly compliments the brutal attack of Sehwag. And he would be perfectly content to play the second fiddle to Sehwag. Ponting, Tendulkar and Lara the three legends of modern cricket automatically pick themselves into the team. Any word used explaining why they do so will be a waste. Next comes Rahul Dravid. With his copybook technique and the ability to hang around while keeping the scoreboard ticking he will be an immense asset to the team. In case of a collapse he can bind the innings together. Adam Gilchrist with his exceptional wicket keeping ability and his ability to blast apart any bowling attack  becomes an automatic choice for the slot of wicket keeper. Next comes Wasim Akram the sultan of swing, followed by the twin spin wizards Shane Warne and Muttiah Muralitharan. Finally comes in the highly accurate Glenn Mcgrath.With such a potent bowling combination and batting order can any team really challenge this team. I think not!